Well, I haven’t made fun of George Bush in a v-e-r-r-y long time but I haven’t had to. Now comes along a new politician (and I use that term lightly) to bring my attention to, Sara Palin! Unfortunately, some one has already beaten me to it.
Sarah Palin is a dumb ass, here are some excerpts:
Sarah Palin is a stupid, self important, ignorant bitch who I wouldn’t put in charge of wiping her own ass. And it’s not just that she’s dumb – which she is – it’s that she’s willfully ignorant of the facts and yet absolutely dead-bang certain that she’s right about her opinions.
Sarah Palin can only name one Supreme Court case – Roe v. Wade. She couldn’t even conjure up Dred Scott, which even Bush was able to do in the second debate with John Kerry…and this is most stunning of all, Exxon v. Baker – concerning the Exxon Valdez. A case which rendered a ruling during her time as Governer of Alaska, and about which she made public statements in protest of the decision.
Sarah Palin either could not or would not name a single newspaper or magazine that she reads. She couldn’t think of one. Not the New York Times, the Daily News, the Washington Post, the Chicago Tribune. Not Time, Newsweek, U.S. News & World Reports. Hell, she couldn’t even think of a local paper in Alaska. Sarah Palin, by the way, has a degree in Journalism. No shit.
I’ve been on holiday for the Fete St. Jean for the last few days so please forgive my lateness on this…I just found out that George Carlin passed away on Sunday night of heart failure.
He was absolutely my all time favourite comedian. More than just a ‘comedian’ he was a social satirist, an agent for change…he pointed out to us our hypocrisies our social ridiculousness…he not only made us laugh at ourselves but helped change the way we see the world and our place in it. For that I will sincerely miss you George.
If you’re unfamiliar with George Carlins work I’ve included something from YouTube.com below for you to enjoy. Do not watch this with the kids around.
*(WARNING: Extreme language…but would you expect any less from George Carlin??)
Ok, ok… if you REALLY want to see the 7 Words bit…click here (Same warning as above…times 2!!)
Well, isn’t this interesting, apparently 59% of women and 54% of men would like to change at least one feature on their partner’s face. This survey done by the American Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery found that men were most likely to take suggestions about plastic surgery as an insult! Women were more likely than men to take suggestions as gestures of love and when the man offered to pay, women were twice as likely to go ahead with plastic surgery.
These are the features respondents would most like to change about their partner:
Hair (24% women, 17% men)
Wrinkles (9% women, 11% men)
Nose (11% women, 9% men)
Mouth (6% each)
Eyes (5% each)
Ears (4% each)
What would you change on your partner if you could? Or is the whole idea repugnant to you?
I found this cool list at MensHealth.com, and thought I’d share it with you, it’s a list of the 18 Things A Grown Man Should Never Have.
A black eye. Unless the rim hits your face mid-dunk, your peepers should remain unblemished. You’re smart enough to talk your way out of any fight you’re going to lose.
A witty e-mail signature. Quotes and song lyrics should be heard during toasts and karaoke performances, respectively. Don’t let your electronic correspondence become the digital version of a motivational poster.
An empty refrigerator. Your larder should be amply stocked, your pantry provisioned. Always aim to be ready to create an on-the-fly, three-course dinner for her…along with breakfast in bed.
PlayStation thumb. When they’re relaxing, grown men can behave like children. But if you devolve long enough to cause calluses or button-shaped bruises, you’re assuredly missing out on life.
A key chain with a bottle opener. This bauble is both a gauche reminder of your college days and proof that you don’t know how to apply leverage using available, impromptu bottle openers: a lighter, the back end of a fork.
A lucky shirt. Every shirt is lucky when worn by a man who knows that the harder he works the luckier he’ll be.
An unstamped passport.
Olympic dreams. Exceptions: curling and archery.
Less than $20 in his wallet. Fiduciary nudity is negligence. A real man should always carry a business card and enough dough to pick up coffee, bagels, and the Sunday paper without whipping out the plastic.
A name for his penis. Even if it’s a really clever name.
Any beer that costs less than $20 a case. And no exception for the grand-slam 30-pack that crosses that price threshold.
The need to quote The Big Lebowski/ Caddyshack/Superbad. Reciting someone else’s lines reminds people that you haven’t the wit to write your own.
A futon. Sure, beds are for sleeping. But such a meager, slouchy spread has never, in the history of sex, inspired a woman to say, “Take me on your futon.”
Code words for ugly women. Actually, code words for anything.
A Nerf hoop in his living room. Keep the adolescent accoutrements where they belong: in the rec room or above the wastebasket in someone else’s office.
A secret handshake.
Drinking glasses with logos. Especially those kitschy McDonald’s Hamburglar ones.
A recent story with the phrase “So I said to the cop… “
Did they miss anything? Add your Man No-No’s in the comment form below…
OK, so there it is. The picture of Miley Cyrus in Vanity Fair magazine that she’s apologizing for. I don’t see it….what’s the big “issue”? Sure, she’s 15 years old and a ‘role model’ to girls younger than that. If you read the whole story you’ll discover that her family was there during the shoot and gave the OK on everything. The photographer was none other than Annie Lebovitz who has devoted some time defending the photograph.
Now, if I had daughters I think I would still be OK if they wanted to watch her TV show and buy her CD’s…this photograph would do nothing to change that. Though the impression that I’m getting is that there are some parents who, based on this photo, have forbade their daughters from having anything to do with the young multimillionaire.
If I remember correctly didn’t Brooke Shields go topless for most of Blue Lagoon when she was 14? And how about the nude scenes she did in Pretty Baby when she was 12?? And speaking of age appropriate…how old was Jodie Foster when she played a prostitute in Taxi Driver…
What do you think? Is this picture worth all of the hullabaloo?? Or is it just a publicity stunt…?
In Episode 2 David Tyler talks with Montréal interior decorator Rebecca Mitchell of rebeccamitchellinteriors.com to get some holiday decorating tips. Listen for the top 5 unfortunately named professionals (you won't believe some of these names), on the 40th anniversary of Sesame Street David has uncovered the rejected Sesame Street show titles and of co […]
David Tyler: UnLeashed - Episode 1
The debut podcast of Montréal radio personality David Tyler featuring an interview with Ambient group Inner Light Spectrum, comedy bit "This is Not the News" David's personal take on the news plus lots of halloween treats for his online listeners.
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Posted by David Tyler 
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